Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birthday to You!

Happy birthday dear husband. Happy birthday to you!

Here's to all the ones we've spent together, and all the ones we'll spend together in the future.

P.S. - I ate an extra piece of cake while we were celebrating my grandma's birthday tonight, just for you :-D

I can't change the world

I know this.

All I want is to change my mom's life. That's not such a big ambition, is it?

She's my mom, and I feel a huge responsibility to help her get things together while I'm here, before I move 800 miles away again. She has three siblings, but none of them will help take care of their 87 year old mother, who has dementia. That's all on my mom, and if the subject of moving her to a home is broached, everyone is either up in arms about it, or could care less. She can't keep taking care of her, the burden is causing awful depression and anxiety. And I don't know how to fix it.

And then there's the horse. Who needs to be sold.

And the fence. That needs to be fixed.

And the house. That needs repair.

And the dog. That needs surgery.

And the absolute lack of fun in her life. That I wish she could find again.

What I've been doing at night

I've found a hobby. And I've sold them. And it's awesome to feel like I actually have some sort of a skill besides changing diapers and cleaning litter boxes. (College education? Was that what those four years in Kent and two summers in Russia were all about? Imagine that.)

They are Amber Teething Necklaces, for anyone wondering what's so special about some little beads.

(Yes, M, there are other crunchy, strange people out there. Not just your wife. I'm thrilled I have proof :-P)



And now for a little cuteness. She is truly the light that gets me through the day. She can reach out and grab hold of my heartstrings and never lets go. I've been down in the deepest corner of the dumps lately, but all she has to do is give me her classic "Mom, I love you!" grin and everything is okay again.

It's not stopping

To continue the theme of the last post . . .

It is only on the day that you don't fall asleep until way after 2am (because you were completely wired all night) that Princess Buttercup (that would be E - she's working hard on earning that Princess nickname) wakes up screaming at 4:45am. And does not go back to sleep.

I don't think me begging her to just take an early nap is going to work today.

I thought I changed my name

Despite the extreme spelling difficulties with my 'new' name, I thought I had made it perfectly clear that I was done with my old one when I signed the dotted line and went through that painful process of switching driver's licenses, social security cards, credit cards, everything.

So, why will this whole Murphy thing not go away? Must I be stuck with this my whole life?

Yes, folks, I'm talking about Murphy's Law. In case you needed it spelled out for you.

How about a run down of my day? That should sum it all up.

~Early early AM: Awake to the sound of cat yacking. Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like his normal I'm-an-old-cat-and-hack-all-the-time stuff. It's a put-yer-slippers-on-in-the-morning kind of sound. Fabulous.

~Still early AM: Baby wakes up. Get up with her and go to her room to change her. Realize that every single clean diaper is in the dryer. Still wet because someone forgot to turn it on last night.

~Mid-morning: Find that a major infestation of aphids has plagued the prized mandevilla plant overnight. Have to toss it and pray that nothing found it's way to any other plants.

~Early afternoon: Check mailbox to find that car registration info that had been mailed at the beginning of the month has been returned to sender. Sender = me. Registration expires the 29th. Clearly, I am SOL after Saturday. Especially since it's going to be in the hands of Liberty County and the geniuses that work there. Considering the address was actually correct, all faith in the postal system is lost, and there is much consideration for just driving the 800 miles on an impromptu vacay to just take care of it in person.

~Mid-afternoon: Run in with oblivious and rude entitlement queen at children's second hand shop in B-town. Narrowly avoid beat-down scenario after being 'bumped' into twice and cut in front of twice. Escape the store with a snarky remark and bewildered saleslady.

~ Mid-afternoon again: Find that the bead store that was the objective of the whole trip to B-town is actually closed on Tuesdays. End up paying nearly three times as much for one item at Michael's. Can we say rip off?

~ Early evening: Outsmarted by the TV, DVD player and satellite receiver. Many, many times.

~Late evening: Discover that the recordable DVDs purchased this afternoon were actually NON-recordable. Only make this discovery after the package is opened and disc inserted and program is starting. Vow revenge on the salesboy that literally handed them over and said "This is what you need."

~Late late evening: Spill ramen noodles ALL over the kitchen floor. And, burn foot, of course.

~Late late late evening: Give up and rant on computer.

It's a sad day

Geauga Lake Amusement Park will be closing it's gates forever after this season is over. 120 years of operation, and now it's going to be shut down. And all the rides taken apart and scattered across the country. And shopping strips and condos built on the 600 acres of the park.

It's a very sad day.

Despite the fact that I haven't been there in years (it just has never been the same since Sea World left), I'm depressed. A huge piece of local history is going to be razzed and it's all because the management over the last 10 years couldn't get their crap together and keep the park going. Shame on them.

(Since I am having yet another fun sleepover at my mom's house tonight and am suffering with her obscenely slow dial-up and annoyingly loud keyboard, I'm not posting any of the pictures or links I had planned to include in this rant. You would give up too if you had internet this slow!)

I'm just not friendly

I'm not. This has been known for quite some time. I don't play well with others.

E and I were at the park today, after a nice long run and ambitious power walk up the monster hill. We were relaxing on a blanket, minding our own business, E was trying to eat my shoe. And then, another mom showed up on the scene. She had a crusty, stained, dirty and snotty faced toddler with her. Who made an instant beeline for our cozy blanket.

"Beebee! Beebee! Beebee!" She shrieked, teetering her way closer and closer, arms outstretched.

Fabulous.

Her mom followed closely behind, telling her to be gentle with the baby. Gentle? Gentle? Gentle is for kittens and puppies. How about don't touch? No? Umm, Stop? Halt? Nein? Nyet? Nelzya?

Thankfully for all of us, she stopped about a foot from the edge of our blanket, threw a handful of grass at E, and then retreated to behind her mother's legs. New people are the highlight of her day, and E was enthralled. I, however, was not. Brushing the grass off her head, I may have given an evil eye or two.

The mom tried to make small talk - asked how old E was (8 months? 9?), commented on not being able to remember when her girl was that little, and how beautiful her eyes are (okay, so I melted a little on this one). Apparently my short, one or two word answers gave off the appropriate vibe, and she picked up her child and headed off to the other side of the park. And then proceeded to evil eye me for the next 15 minutes.

Maybe I need to carry around a little warning sign I could set up around us, letting everyone know that I am not a friendly person and don't take well to germy, dirty toddlers hurtling towards my child.

The months just keep rolling by . . .

She's 5 months already. Time just keeps slipping away. Of course, the older she gets, the closer we are to M coming home. But, she's still growing up too fast already. Recently she learned to scoot. Backwards. And it's hilarious, cause she gets so pissed off when she can't figure out why her toys are now out of reach all of a sudden. Today she scooted backwards into the cat though, so she may figure out a way to use this to her advantage pretty soon. He was just minding his own business, staring at the birds on the balcony, when out of nowhere he got booted in the rear end. He jumped, she laughed, and then he hid. It's the start of a vicious cycle.


I finally got the memory card to my new camera the other day and have been slowly learning the ins and outs. I am way too impatient, and spent way too little time reading the instruction manual before expecting to be off and shooting. This morning was full of frustration, trying to figure out how to work the remote for the shutter. Turns out there's a one-touch button to turn the sensor on. Imagine that. Only took me an hour to find it. Once I got the hang of and a few other fun selections, it was non-stop photography. I got this keeper just playing around with the focus points. It's amazing the clarity that this camera has over our old one. I've just been sitting here staring, marveling at the sharpness. I'm in love :-)

Excuses, excuses

Before I had a child, I was perpetually late. Now I have an excuse.

And this is it . . .

We were doing so good this morning. I had 20 minutes to feed E and head out the door to church. Plenty of time. I thought. Until she threw a tantrum to beat all other tantrums, and promptly passed out as soon as I set her on the bed. The girl needs her beauty rest, no matter what schedule I may have for us.

Pieces and parts

I have a brand spanking new camera sitting here staring at me.

"Turn me on! Use me! Use me! Use me!"

But alas, I have every imaginable variety of camera paraphernalia . . . except a memory card. Which I clearly need to play with the camera.

At the sound of the UPS truck out in the parking lot this afternoon, I sprinted from window to window, tracking the guy in brown from building to building. My heart sank more than just a little as he drove away without visiting my building. No memory card for me today.

This is just one of the many reasons I despise using Amazon.com for any purchases. Three things ordered, all from different companies. Of course they won't get here together. No matter how much I stare out the window, willing the UPS guy to turn around.

The next time I want a climbing vine . . .

Someone please talk me out of it.

Well, actually no, don't do that. But at least remind me of the ordeal I just went through tonight. Spending over an hour gently unwinding a full trellis of Mandevilla vine was not the wisest idea. Apparently I get a little too attached to my plants and couldn't bear the thought of letting the gorgeous vine succumb to the cold snap we're getting tonight. Currently, it is residing in my bedroom, waiting for me to figure out what to do with the 15 + feet of vines.

Clearly I was not planning ahead when I planted this in the spring.

Refreshed

M and I had a wonderful chat tonight. We needed that 'let it all out' kind of conversation. It's reassuring to know that we can both point out the good and the bad about the other person, and go somewhere productive with those points.

I worry about the future, and he's reassuring. Even if he doesn't realize it. I need that.

During the conversation, some of the lighter notes focused on a possible venture to Vegas. And now I'm daydreaming (or would it be night-dreaming, since it's clearly not day now?) of giant whirlpool tubs, with gorgeous views of the city and a bottle or two of wine. And us, of course. Ah, the simple things dreams are made of. Where would the best suite be found . . . that's the preoccupation now.

Aside from the wonderful bonding conversation, our day around here was uneventful. Playing with E, cleaning up spit up every 15 seconds, and then venturing out to the Post Office and the grocery store. And then E helped me put the groceries away :-)

There's smoke coming from my debit card!

Oh lordy, lordy! I just ordered my camera. My super special, fancy pants, dream camera. And thinking about how much I just paid for something I don't NEED . . . well, that mixed with the food court Chinese food I had this afternoon . . . my stomach is in knots.

Now I get to not-so-patiently wait for each of the parts to arrive . . .

Popsicles!

"You're not lying to me, right Mommy? I really am going to like this?"

"Yum! It really is good!"

"Oh, but it's cold!"
"Add this to your Things Made with Breastmilk recipe book, Mom. It gets an A+!"

The Greeaaat Geauga County Fair

On Sunday and Monday, my mom and I took E to the fair. Long story short, it was hot, it was fun and I can't wait till next year. I'm sure we can time a visit back up here around then.

A few highlights to supplement that long-short story:
~E loves watching the horses and was enthralled during the Draft and Pony Show. I think she liked the jingling from the harnesses.
~The KHS Marching Band sounds horrible and is sooo tiny now compared to when we were in it.
~I only saw one person I knew. I think that's a new record.
~I drank at least 300 oz of birch beer. Refills were just 2$, and I wasn't letting that deal get away!
~I successfully nursed in public (really public public) 5 times. I consider myself a pro now. It was an excellent crash course.
~E was in the Mei Tai almost all day both days and was happy as a clam. Until bedtime. Then she realized she wasn't in her bed and took unhappy to a whole new level.

Loving the horses!

Eying grandma's onion rings.

And here I thought I had escaped having my picture taken today.
And yet again, grandma loves the camera. E loves her Mei Tai.

And that was the fair!

How would I entertain her without the cats?

"You can't hide for long!"

"Cause I will find you!"

"Even if you can't see me!"

Dear Mr. Too Impatient to Chill for a Second

Dear Mr. Too Impatient to Chill for a Second

I'm sorry that when I happened to pull out into the road today I pulled out too close to you. I had never realized that over 1000 feet would not be enough distance. I apologize for the fact that by the time you came screeching up behind me, I was only going the speed limit. I was unaware that we are now required to go at least 20 mph over it on that road now. Please forgive me for failing to increase my speed in response to your bright lights being flipped on and off several times, and to your ability to hit your horn so many times in a row. It was truly impressive. However, my sleeping daughter was not impressed, as she was quickly woken up with your noise. I felt it only fair to retaliate. I'm sorry your weaving back and forth in your lane did not prompt me to speed back up the 10 mph to the posted speed limit. I do want to assure you that I was seriously considering break checking you, however, I am quite fond of my obnoxiously slow vehicle. I am so glad that you were able to seize the moment to fly past me while no cars were coming, even though it was a no passing zone. I do hope that no bugs got on that hand of yours that was outstretched from the window, pointing towards me. It is such a shame that as you crested the hill in front of me, you happened to pass one of our town's finest police officers. I truly am sorry that I had to turn before I got the chance to pass you, as you were being pulled over. I do hope you told the person you were on the phone with all about it.

Sincerely,
The Woman Who Drives Like a Normal Person