tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4387530740247342702024-03-05T13:36:24.666-05:00My Longest Yearjaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.comBlogger179125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-30250329266428677562008-04-17T19:37:00.001-04:002008-04-17T22:37:08.122-04:00And That's ThatThe husband has been home for two weeks. We've hit some bumpy patches already, but we're adjusting pretty well after those 444 days apart. The kid loves him, I love him, it's all good.<br /><br />Amazingly, the kid has survived her first year. She's officially a walking, talking one year old now. I know time wouldn't have flown by the way it feels like it did, had I not had her.<br /><br />I had a big, dramatic farewell to My Longest Year speech planned, but it's been a long day. So, I'll just say that if you want to find me from here on out, I'll be over <a href="http://theyankeedrawl.blogspot.com/">here</a>.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">See ya there!<br /></div><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZfR9wRQDNyvCZdeNb8MYwSkhuNx1y2GReS_ezKzGhB-gVSBRu1mOc8wPvnMlDLnvEf1odMUDp5OdlKSpJOZ-dpW5hKkJHcUPNGInV8h3Z2l-y02LKCIHotXKsxO5VXOfoe3Gz52ILC9c/s1600-h/4.17.08+1+Year+Old+1b.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZfR9wRQDNyvCZdeNb8MYwSkhuNx1y2GReS_ezKzGhB-gVSBRu1mOc8wPvnMlDLnvEf1odMUDp5OdlKSpJOZ-dpW5hKkJHcUPNGInV8h3Z2l-y02LKCIHotXKsxO5VXOfoe3Gz52ILC9c/s320/4.17.08+1+Year+Old+1b.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190363290360093042" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-78808707287299791852008-04-16T00:48:00.002-04:002008-04-16T00:56:20.411-04:00Slacker!Yes, I am. I suck. I know.<br /><br />Everyone came on over a few posts back and here I've dropped the ball on wining and dining you all to keep you around.<br /><br />I do have an excuse though . . . besides the obvious, of course . . .<br /><br />We're moving!<br /><br />Well, not we as in real life me. The only things getting packed up are in the bloggy world. My longest year is over, so it's time to move on to a happier place. Or, at least, it should be a happier place. We shall see.<br /><br />So, get your blogrolls and readers ready (unless, of course, you could care less and would be happy to see this blog covered in cobwebs). I'll be back on Thursday to give a grand tour of the new digs. There's still some construction and painting going on, so you can't come over just yet.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-65306328010791262982008-04-13T18:04:00.006-04:002008-04-13T19:32:31.978-04:00Welcome Back, Boys!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikStxKvDxlnGhUQ7-29BncsE7FAPPRUf3udnPO5nV-sSOZxfOmYUSMsSOrU7i7RtIu5qwLVsQm-HBPIijtjFxv4KHsAE6I9GIYIVufiYH4XmR-NApg2kWW5r2c7PHgXqmNMNUkbCch8Gs/s1600-h/alcohol.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikStxKvDxlnGhUQ7-29BncsE7FAPPRUf3udnPO5nV-sSOZxfOmYUSMsSOrU7i7RtIu5qwLVsQm-HBPIijtjFxv4KHsAE6I9GIYIVufiYH4XmR-NApg2kWW5r2c7PHgXqmNMNUkbCch8Gs/s320/alcohol.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5188854300845283170" border="0" /></a><br />Last night was the first of many single soldier gathering at the Longest Year household. I cooked an awesome meal (Jayna's Hungarian shrimp and pasta and fried tomatoes) and our guests brought the drinks and dessert. Let me just say that wine, 21 year old scotch and ice cream cake don't mix so very well. (Though, ice cream cake is awesome for breakfast the next day.) The kid was amazing and flirted with all the boys during dinner, and then passed right out and slept through the din of 5 drunken soldiers telling war stories in the kitchen. She's awesome, even though she did wake us up at 5:30 this morning.<br /><br />Yesterday the husband also picked up our brand new bicycles and broke his in by doing drunken wheelies up and down our street at 11 at night. I spent the majority of the time yelling "Car!" and shaking my head as the husband wiped out in the neighbor's front lawn (yes, we are those neighbors. PWT hooligans, all the way). Each of our guests also got a turn, as it's only proper to share, and they didn't disappoint in the stupidity either. Only on his bike, though. Not mine. I don't share that well.<br /><br />I'm loving the husband being home, and loving the friends he is bringing over. It's nice to be at ease with a group of guys and feel perfectly comfortable ripping on them just as hard as I would on the husband.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-28336096162239002282008-04-11T22:04:00.003-04:002008-04-11T22:27:32.725-04:00Just Gut the PlaceMold problem? Still got it.<br /><br />Sopping wet puddle under the carpet in the garage room? Still there.<br /><br />Daily quota of at least 5 roaches maimed? My aim is getting a lot better.<br /><br />Broken dishwasher? Oh, that's a new one.<br /><br />Oven that doesn't heat up? Even better.<br /><br /><br />If I wasn't so sick of moving (and if I hadn't just given away all our packing boxes), I would be getting all legal-ish on their asses and moving far, far away from this dump.<br /><br />We seriously thought we were getting somewhere. Monday started off with a series of phone calls and ended with the promise of an exterminator and a handyman. Here, it's Friday and the only thing the maintenance guy has managed to do was wander across my clean kitchen floor, scuff dirt everywhere, shut the dishwasher and turn it on. And then leave. I wasn't home when he came (of course, they have a radar for that, the only time I've left the house all week). I found the dishwasher still locked shut and on the drying cycle. The friggin' idiot obviously didn't even look inside and see that there is a giant broken piece on the bottom and it's full of water. Plus, we were using it as a drying rack, so things got thrown all helter skelter and a bunch of sippy cup lids got burned up by the heating element. Those things are like gold lately around here, so that man is lucky he wasn't here for me to go off on about it.<br /><br />My skin is always crawling, I'm ridiculously paranoid about the kid eating a roach, I can't use my damn oven, and I'm sick of worrying that we're going to get sick from the mold.<br /><br />If I could stomach it, all the carcasses of this weekend's vermin murders would be stuck in a jar and slammed down on someone's desk Monday morning.<br /><br />The husband can't do it, cause he screams like a little girl and runs away from the bastards. (Yes, I like to keep reminding everyone of that.)jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-22851054444699898152008-04-09T21:38:00.001-04:002008-04-09T21:40:50.522-04:00Way Late Wordless Wednesday - Fast Friends<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsEDw5tTYWjKhUWfzZRLGrUMqFSUWem5SjuURQLuH6jLhnc5vV7SE80e1WtaxL6UCnS22KAv71FiPIA6vMXhr3xh_SKbDEPUuw2Gd_nDhwDVbMhWc4KWGV4sLN_EiVKzWBQdpf_Ch-f1c/s1600-h/4.6.08+Out+to+lunch.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsEDw5tTYWjKhUWfzZRLGrUMqFSUWem5SjuURQLuH6jLhnc5vV7SE80e1WtaxL6UCnS22KAv71FiPIA6vMXhr3xh_SKbDEPUuw2Gd_nDhwDVbMhWc4KWGV4sLN_EiVKzWBQdpf_Ch-f1c/s320/4.6.08+Out+to+lunch.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5187425512701126146" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-68959244936943706042008-04-07T21:40:00.004-04:002008-04-07T22:26:48.545-04:00Have I Got A Story For YouI might as well jump right on back into the blog with a giant splash. A great alternative title to this one would be The Bedroom Chronicles.<br /><br />Why, yes, there will be talk of sex. Hide the children.<br /><br />So. Yeah. Obviously, it's been a wicked long time since the husband was home last, and obviously it's been that long since I've had sex . . . So, obviously, birth control was the last thing on my mind until recently. Before I left Ohio, I paid a visit to the obgyn and got fitted for a diaphragm. I said good riddance to hormonal birth control long ago, and this seemed like a good option. I filled my prescription, packed it away in a box and didn't have a second thought about it.<br /><br />And then, all of a sudden, homecoming rolled around. Huh. Imagine that. There we were, baby fast asleep ("Okay, sweetie, hurry up and go to bed early tonight, Mommy's gotta get laid!"), and the unopened diaphragm box sitting on the bed between us. The directions for this thing were like a phone book. The odds of failure were daunting. The entire situation was nothing but clinical. ("Yeah baby, welcome home. Now read these directions.")<br /><br />In the end, alternative measures were taken and we had a lovely time. Or, as lovely as is to be expected after that experience and in light of what happened next.<br /><br />Again, I obviously hadn't had sex recently, so I was completely unaware as to the wonderful side effects of breastfeeding.<br /><br />Yes, those of you who have been there and done that and know exactly what I'm talking about can laugh at me now.<br /><br />In my defense, it was really hot in our room. So, I don't think I was all that far off when I started thinking to myself that the husband was really sweating. A lot. Like, massive amounts. I made a mental note to rip on him afterwards. But, he got me first. Basking in that afterglow, he turned to me and said "You leaked all over me!"<br /><br />Allllll over. I'm surprised he didn't drown in the puddle that was on the bed.<br /><br />I could totally do without that lovely bodily function.<br /><br />At least he thought it was funny.<br /><br />Not nearly as funny as what happened the next morning though . . .<br /><br />Being the wonderful husband he is, he took the child out to the living room to play while I slept for another few minutes. I woke up and rolled out of bed. As I turned around to grab something off the night stand I saw something that makes me still want to throw up a little whenever I think about it.<br /><br />Crawling out from under my pillow . . . giant, brown, filthy, nasty . . . a three inch long cockroach.<br /><br />I screamed so loud that instantly the baby started cry and the husband came running. They found me jumping around like a manic trying to smash that bastard bug with a toilet paper roll.<br /><br />I'm ashamed to say he got away. Hopefully he found some tasty roach bait and is dead in a corner somewhere tonight. If he's not, he will be, because we've finally got the exterminators coming out. This horrible excuse for a livable rental house is driving me insane, and that is just the first step in not having my skin crawl just by sitting on the couch. Bastards are all going to die!<br /><br />And that, my friends, is The Bedroom Chronicles.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-79587344752192217792008-04-04T08:23:00.002-04:002008-04-04T08:27:07.825-04:00A QuickieWhile the two of them are dancing around the living room to Jimi Hendrix . . .<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC2p4ASWFE99CPGf6xNO0t3SnVLUO6kSdLUvI0J92vnC1TFFQVwLi8TTXLtdBdUrxpKqIZYvE0iQ4-TKp7XPE8pF8Mg8DnJD-5iiyWbSGwxAGnMH_PP3r1Y7xxZet4ROa35g_FXenK3AQ/s1600-h/homecoming1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC2p4ASWFE99CPGf6xNO0t3SnVLUO6kSdLUvI0J92vnC1TFFQVwLi8TTXLtdBdUrxpKqIZYvE0iQ4-TKp7XPE8pF8Mg8DnJD-5iiyWbSGwxAGnMH_PP3r1Y7xxZet4ROa35g_FXenK3AQ/s320/homecoming1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5185365090910146834" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-46065719093865433052008-04-03T09:56:00.002-04:002008-04-03T09:57:22.811-04:00Here We Go!!!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSxsdSQiWqfeFT2v9tG9LWPS30sR8iv6JwAvSmuhzvWDr2V8SYBHCWrpZKKf1Ard-7zF5OF-IXtcdX2Xc2yMOFdbK65YP_CqO2LLk1rXYLX1DTCFzXGTXpT_A3QTBjwYbbEYyjE71-7ic/s1600-h/car.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSxsdSQiWqfeFT2v9tG9LWPS30sR8iv6JwAvSmuhzvWDr2V8SYBHCWrpZKKf1Ard-7zF5OF-IXtcdX2Xc2yMOFdbK65YP_CqO2LLk1rXYLX1DTCFzXGTXpT_A3QTBjwYbbEYyjE71-7ic/s320/car.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5185017739725050114" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com37tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-37289027056514571662008-04-02T23:15:00.003-04:002008-04-02T23:21:20.826-04:00The New ChecklistSudafed - check<br /><br />Thermometer - check<br /><br />Tissues - check, check, triple check<br /><br />Clothes shoved into a basket in the corner of the closet instead of put away - check<br /><br />Top Chef and a comfy couch - check<br /><br />A pre-warned husband that his wife may snot all over him tomorrow - check<br /><br /><br />And, I lost a shoe in the move. And now have no shoes to go with my smokin' hot dress.<br /><br />Enough is enough already!!!<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"><br />(And really, don't anyone worry. I'm not going anywhere any time soon. I'm plenty capable of posting while showering my husband with attention. Or, making him think I am.)</span>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-50462475676784827162008-04-02T00:31:00.002-04:002008-04-02T00:39:44.397-04:00May I Pee Myself Now?Car window chalk - check<br /><br />Posterboard - check<br /><br />Markers - check<br /><br />Adorable baby girl dress and sandals - check<br /><br />Smoking hot mommy dress and heels - check<br /><br />Meat thawed in fridge - check<br /><br />Clean sheets, fresh towels, comfy clothes - check<br /><br />Birth control - check<br />(hey, he's gotta start with this one first before we work on that second one)<br /><br />Nervous energy, lack of bladder control, loss of appetite - check<br /><br /><br /><br />Gah! I have no idea how I'm going to make it all the way though tomorrow and the next morning without exploding!<br /><br />It's about damn time I started getting excited about this.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-47621677130267847822008-03-31T19:36:00.007-04:002008-03-31T20:13:56.982-04:00I Did Promise Pictures<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHFTyFJfscWUVktxyqIKyXbGDxOxAQXwpl9nMFV4_5TQiCb2z36OEIK3EqeUxnsDO30HL6KDbzZBoBVF7QcvzCBAu6TbaLMN2FB-tY1qpT12sFFO0wAfBSqn1qZX2sN05m3DIUc_9oXCc/s1600-h/gangstababy1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHFTyFJfscWUVktxyqIKyXbGDxOxAQXwpl9nMFV4_5TQiCb2z36OEIK3EqeUxnsDO30HL6KDbzZBoBVF7QcvzCBAu6TbaLMN2FB-tY1qpT12sFFO0wAfBSqn1qZX2sN05m3DIUc_9oXCc/s320/gangstababy1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5184053970538664114" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFpHlG31pNXe66Oew4_Cjl4rTUVVok5H9718BKDJPK4M71ZcUSKAq1g8iUFRTzxnOObOCKrP0Ie0i3An9xYCgVNNtaH47XDq5BRditeO4_cgRTlDFoXL7qQsPMw-oF2V8zBrtIqc9Tri0/s1600-h/gangstababy2.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFpHlG31pNXe66Oew4_Cjl4rTUVVok5H9718BKDJPK4M71ZcUSKAq1g8iUFRTzxnOObOCKrP0Ie0i3An9xYCgVNNtaH47XDq5BRditeO4_cgRTlDFoXL7qQsPMw-oF2V8zBrtIqc9Tri0/s320/gangstababy2.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5184054034963173570" border="0" /></a><br />She has finally gotten settled after the 2 days of driving, two nights in hotels, being passed like a hot potato from grandparent to grandparent, teething some molars, and being in a strange new house. Her room is absolutely huge and the daily goal seems to be to cover the entire surface of the floor with toys. Clearly she has enough toys when that is possible.<br /><br />Now, as for the house . . . real pictures are just going to have to wait, as I've been a tad bit busy dealing with the fact that it's an absolute shithole. Hindsight is 20/20 and I am kicking my own ass about being too freaking cheap to come down here and check it out before hand. Of course, I probably would have never seen the most major of the problems then anyways.<br /><br />So far, a few things have been resolved. There are no more spiders, and I've only maimed an occasional roach. I now have hot water, heat and air conditioning. We installed a screen for the sliding door and got a few temporary window screens, so I can open the place up. The leaking washer hook-up has been replaced. The ripped and torn and lint spewing dryer vent pipe has been replaced. And it's become an overall clean place to stay. However . . .<br /><br />There is a huge ass leak in the wall behind the kitchen, mold in the kitchen cabinets, and a puddle under the carpet in the spare room, which used to be the garage.<br /><br />That's a bit of an issue.<br /><br />We found the mold and leak through a bit of a process. I went to go clean my bottom shelves and lo and behold, they were bending and disintegrating at the slightest touch. We decided to rip them out and stick some plywood in there so that they were at least a little bit usable. Turns out, there was a surprise underneath there.<br /><br /> <div style="text-align: center;">Before<br /></div> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBrPXS7_9tPaIwRVjR5fOS9oo3iKOa3zfzSGijVGLsQUU7lsOncE0qJ4Bgenh7liY25Y5FvN7Um0HWQX0H6HqAhCqidwHBVjtJ11OkhtE6-3oCXTq5VmludXVCPO9Wr_O7Oz-5fAD2iUk/s1600-h/kitchencabinet1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBrPXS7_9tPaIwRVjR5fOS9oo3iKOa3zfzSGijVGLsQUU7lsOncE0qJ4Bgenh7liY25Y5FvN7Um0HWQX0H6HqAhCqidwHBVjtJ11OkhtE6-3oCXTq5VmludXVCPO9Wr_O7Oz-5fAD2iUk/s320/kitchencabinet1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5184058686412755154" border="0" /></a><br /><div style="text-align: center;">During<br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7vufpzszhpKDVAl_7rGOSlSZXGQzyEH8H-V35TwWce5vr7btIuUcXkgn08y-TyKE7C7cxQZGarjTSq4xkxlLM9IUhx3fLdNMtNoCxN1v7tUHk-HaM1TtxmlXh8aGLlNnUJWMpdLGhtmU/s1600-h/kitchencabinet2.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7vufpzszhpKDVAl_7rGOSlSZXGQzyEH8H-V35TwWce5vr7btIuUcXkgn08y-TyKE7C7cxQZGarjTSq4xkxlLM9IUhx3fLdNMtNoCxN1v7tUHk-HaM1TtxmlXh8aGLlNnUJWMpdLGhtmU/s320/kitchencabinet2.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5184058802376872162" border="0" /></a><br />After clean up<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSlG1feae1ZXKF36uX2VfCjo99JpCiZ-7BIBnwIVB877rg41DPu_N-oAbD0ijdfqCOhTruqbTFEGYMK5yg7ZOmTRdtL-7o1ql6voIiTuFJezJRhSX-PbH-vIsUvBTDKCPZT_K06JrN-D0/s1600-h/kitchencabinet3.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSlG1feae1ZXKF36uX2VfCjo99JpCiZ-7BIBnwIVB877rg41DPu_N-oAbD0ijdfqCOhTruqbTFEGYMK5yg7ZOmTRdtL-7o1ql6voIiTuFJezJRhSX-PbH-vIsUvBTDKCPZT_K06JrN-D0/s320/kitchencabinet3.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5184058888276218098" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">Appetizing, isn't it?<br /><br />All of my kitchen stuff is still in boxes, as I obviously have no where to put it. That, and I have a little nagging voice in the back of my head telling me this is bad, really bad, and we're going to have to get the heck outta here and move to a non mold infested place.<br /><br />Is it bad that I just ate an entire chocolate bunny today, which I was saving for the husband?<br /></div></div>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-27614839166355908722008-03-27T20:26:00.002-04:002008-03-27T21:40:15.922-04:00And Here I SitA cat-hiding rule breaker in a completely dark and quiet room. The only light is from the computer, and the only sound is the snoring baby . . . and the keyboard . . . and the dumbass meowing cats . . . and the fucking crickets . . . and the trucks roaring by on the highway.<br /><br />Here I sit, in a Holiday Inn. After two days of driving and wanting to throw my stepmother out the window. Two days of listening to endless nagging about just taking the kid out of her car seat to feed her, and about just turning her car seat around because her feet touch the seat back (if I have to explain about internal decapitation one more time . . .).<br /><br />In the past two days I have dealt with:<br />~Being expected to drive all night with the kid and then be coherant enough to take care of her the next day.<br />~Truckers. Obnoxious truckers driving side-by-side at 50 miles an hour for 40 miles.<br />~Parental units. You want mine? Take them. They're all yours. I'll throw in the father-in-law as a freebie.<br />~Extracting three cats from their hiding spots under the hotel bed you thought they couldn't get under. Only accomplished by literally removing the mattress and bedsprings.<br />~A nursing strike. You want pain? Try having your kid go from nursing 7 times a day to 2.<br />~Milk. Exploding. Everywhere. (Since the child wouldn't nurse, we had to do the sippy. After setting a container of the frozen stuff on the dash to thaw during lunch, we came back to find puddles of milk everywhere. Thank God I had it far enough away from the vents.)<br />~General loosing of my mind. I'll thank all involved parties for this one.<br />~The House. This one gets a post of it's own, preferably accompanied by pictures. I'll give you a teaser though . . . hundreds of dead spiders, live roaches, 20+ year old appliances, ceiling so dirty you could write your name on it (if you could reach it), and a surprise diagnosis of having gas heat instead of electric. Which, of course, needs to be serviced and hooked up properly. And, of course, isn't going to happen in any timely matter.<br /><br />Hence, the hotel.<br /><br />I'll be back after some harsh words with the rental company, an appointment with a steam cleaner, and a few hard drinks.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-26900070087063678602008-03-26T00:14:00.002-04:002008-03-26T00:27:13.461-04:00If Anyone Needs MeI'll be in the nearest mental institution.<br /><br />See you all in 800 miles.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-82181457401669725052008-03-20T23:21:00.006-04:002008-03-20T23:33:00.094-04:00The Box Is WaitingI was accused yesterday by the husband of being a pack rat. He elaborated to say that, no, I am just a pack rat for boxes. Which I fully admit, and have no shame. You know why?<br /><br />Because my nearly new, absolutely perfect, dearly beloved iMac will be riding in style in it's original box. And I will be a hell of a lot calmer about sticking it underneath 5 tons of cat and kid stuff in the back of my car.<br /><br />So, in the box it goes. Tomorrow.<br /><br />I've got butterflies kick-boxing me in my stomach lately.<br /><br />Tomorrow, E, the cats, and I will head off to my mom's for a few days. The trailer is getting loaded on Saturday, and the wagon train is kicking off on Wednesday.<br /><br />Here come the Yankees!!<br /><br />So, being that all my pictures are on this computer, and I'll be slumming it on my mother's HP after this . . . I give you E's Easter pictures. Or, at least, the four I felt like editing.<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmJwtjbBgZQgQbft_79T0fkIz9etCdPP0ixcfy2_N6Bq1dE_zkyPovdm_Qb4WNXv7aEYJ41aOj6jlORxg3138nqscBqPgHUn4mtwrJbTQduf8YoBIET5qzn8CGALAP4RBfvSnAAZ9R4hw/s1600-h/E+1st+Easter+Photos+63.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmJwtjbBgZQgQbft_79T0fkIz9etCdPP0ixcfy2_N6Bq1dE_zkyPovdm_Qb4WNXv7aEYJ41aOj6jlORxg3138nqscBqPgHUn4mtwrJbTQduf8YoBIET5qzn8CGALAP4RBfvSnAAZ9R4hw/s320/E+1st+Easter+Photos+63.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5180032519644975266" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi7ImnbBqs6_izdTUtt-OyKGmpvTg2GjtxZgU-jjnsUWI23dUMqmf5uPzdWi6xfLJPIgXjbMNv_2l1hpKm5QVauiVimNUaWIMXyOFnNF_V8M8AJAyMYuGTYYgmELiD6YdnqSL1GcA0Ra0/s1600-h/E+1st+Easter+Photos+53.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi7ImnbBqs6_izdTUtt-OyKGmpvTg2GjtxZgU-jjnsUWI23dUMqmf5uPzdWi6xfLJPIgXjbMNv_2l1hpKm5QVauiVimNUaWIMXyOFnNF_V8M8AJAyMYuGTYYgmELiD6YdnqSL1GcA0Ra0/s320/E+1st+Easter+Photos+53.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5180032420860727442" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPbpxwfK-pXJDNfyrjUAyk7vUlFfy0f-CjkA_HRIEnoFl1LjJseVR-xjhxt6xMMX9wBnUC6r7qszd3fu8rKea7Db5QqImYWSCWnoZ_tAG8GZyrsMhhA2NYtuj6ZaH5SPNgH03I0gQ9bWQ/s1600-h/E+1st+Easter+Photos+51.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPbpxwfK-pXJDNfyrjUAyk7vUlFfy0f-CjkA_HRIEnoFl1LjJseVR-xjhxt6xMMX9wBnUC6r7qszd3fu8rKea7Db5QqImYWSCWnoZ_tAG8GZyrsMhhA2NYtuj6ZaH5SPNgH03I0gQ9bWQ/s320/E+1st+Easter+Photos+51.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5180032317781512322" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHtI28rAsqmSPhAlAa6jSWTAyJlTWPJXLuTAylRC9WbxT8lU6o4is4ABZFbBQwszubFPNkpU6iL3qeMifuqN2NeopgjRK-qd0drFpp5vCfuBl4W5Fu8cKiqB3aj-C-VC-2EIKACDbKYb4/s1600-h/E+1st+Easter+Photos+10.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHtI28rAsqmSPhAlAa6jSWTAyJlTWPJXLuTAylRC9WbxT8lU6o4is4ABZFbBQwszubFPNkpU6iL3qeMifuqN2NeopgjRK-qd0drFpp5vCfuBl4W5Fu8cKiqB3aj-C-VC-2EIKACDbKYb4/s320/E+1st+Easter+Photos+10.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5180032206112362610" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-62731313677646766042008-03-20T01:04:00.002-04:002008-03-20T01:17:10.529-04:00Stand Back, I Am Not A ProfessionalAt one point during this week, I thought it would be fun to photograph my progress in boxing up our life again. Show everyone the mass confusion and jungle gym free-for-all in my living room.<br /><br />But somewhere along the way, I packed the camera charger.<br /><br />Bugger.<br /><br />Instead, I'll just rant about how much stuff we have. Good lord, do we have a lot of crap. I remember moving in to our apartment in Texas (three moves ago) and having one of M's friends marvel at how many boxes there were.<br /><br />That was nothing.<br /><br />Add in the three bedroom house we had to fill, and then a kid. No wonder I can't see across the room anymore. Thankfully though, it seems to be an even split between me and the husband for contribution. Gone are the days when all of his worldly possessions fit into one Rubbermaid tote. (Thank you, Army)<br /><br />I am making things a little more fun this time though. Instead of neatly labeling every box and trying to keep things together, it's all randomness. I was sorting out sections of light, medium, heavy and holy shit heavy earlier and saw I hadn't labeled anything I packed yesterday. So, it will be like a giant treasure hunt in the new house, opening every box to find one thing.<br /><br />Though, that could make unpacking go a lot quicker.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-73709571996835688702008-03-17T23:03:00.003-04:002008-03-17T23:11:49.536-04:0011 Months OldFor once I'm hitting the monthly milestone on the right day. The kid is 11 months old. Climbing everything - couches, chairs, boxes, baby gates, over dogs, bathtub sides, toilets, window sills. It won't be long before I find her swinging from the chandelier. She is growing into a little replica of her daddy, constant chatter, snuggle bum, and a lover of all things involving uncontrollable laughter. She says "neigh" for horses, "meow" for cats and just laughs at the dogs. I'm waiting for the day when she actually tells me off when I take away the paper she has shoved in her mouth, instead of screaming "BAH BAH BAH!" at me. (We all know she really means "Hey! Stupid $%*#@! Gimme my %$#@%*% paper back!!")<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJ71i822jbIY-WvGdOUx5LMU9A5eZ_CNDxR-UQQ9UhgMnRIriZlLrAD64to-eST31i2h-zprbGbWJ6N8eWtUYjTb60pzTjQ_RStZyk0RC62tf6HkeGOCESNo5IFGgCfH5UurF1anIaoHE/s1600-h/3.17.08+11+Months+Old+1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJ71i822jbIY-WvGdOUx5LMU9A5eZ_CNDxR-UQQ9UhgMnRIriZlLrAD64to-eST31i2h-zprbGbWJ6N8eWtUYjTb60pzTjQ_RStZyk0RC62tf6HkeGOCESNo5IFGgCfH5UurF1anIaoHE/s320/3.17.08+11+Months+Old+1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5178911985093795330" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-68448741406401315682008-03-17T00:59:00.004-04:002008-03-17T01:04:00.640-04:00If You Don't Have Stairs<div style="text-align: center;">Make your own!<br /></div><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhi_E0RwKxc9etPsFMhdshdc079B4iVv8bGBerzwHU-XFQupB9yzlAu6rXJMobSyIQoyO8FwgAS2ElCi1nftVvKqP42W0eMrUC5umxZBgHCRk8GCLwSFs4yGQgiGn2LO_2JEbHntIOwL2k/s1600-h/Untitled-1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhi_E0RwKxc9etPsFMhdshdc079B4iVv8bGBerzwHU-XFQupB9yzlAu6rXJMobSyIQoyO8FwgAS2ElCi1nftVvKqP42W0eMrUC5umxZBgHCRk8GCLwSFs4yGQgiGn2LO_2JEbHntIOwL2k/s320/Untitled-1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5178570835841474034" border="0" /></a><br /><div style="text-align: center;">This is what happens and makes one realize that it's no longer safe to go pee by yourself.<br /></div>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-80659811415330745002008-03-14T01:27:00.002-04:002008-03-14T01:45:57.278-04:00This Is A New OneFour moves in three years, and I've learned a lot of valuable tidbits of information along the way. Such as:<br /><br />~If something is painted blue, it will rub on your couch in the one spot that isn't covered.<br />~Fishtanks break. Especially when the elevator door closes on them.<br />~Nothing ever goes back together again the same way. That desk will always wobble and that chair will always creak.<br />~Sleeper sofas are a bitch to get up and down three flights of stairs.<br />~Never, ever throw away a box. Otherwise you'll be wishing you still had what that table/microwave/sewing machine came in.<br />~Flirt with the box boys at the grocery store and those egg boxes are all yours.<br />~Putting the screws to every unassembled piece of furniture in one bag is a really, really bad idea.<br />~Rubbermaid totes are not meant to be filled with textbooks. Nor are they meant to be so full even duct tape won't hold.<br />~Do not pack the toilet paper. Last thing in, first thing out.<br />~9 months pregnant really is a great time to move. Telling other people where to put those boxes is a lot more fun than carrying them.<br />~It's never to early to start packing. Heck, why unpack? Keep half your stuff in boxes, ready to go!<br /><br />But, the most valuable thing I learned while packing today? Do not try to pack up an 11 month old's room while they are with you. Book in the box, book out of the box. Dress in the box, dress out of the box. Stuffies in the box, screaming tantrum from the child. More toys in the box, absolutely livid child. Child in the box, much more fun.<br /><br />It doesn't help that she's still in the stage where gnawing off chunks of the cardboard is appealing. I got bit more times than I could count, while fishing out soggy bits and pieces.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-48844349223632761862008-03-12T01:29:00.002-04:002008-03-12T01:32:27.252-04:00Wordless Wednesday - Which One of These Things is Not Like the Other?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqOKijjoxevV69p6Kaut4G5v8dW3C2HMlJfnb_4nLsjxATcAZugeZWc2Z86qzlY7tTnHAm-_pUn3WGNhLGNzyLCyjpxDkp-KdnXDYPGs6KDme5P044dG3bPcMWR7BwPo6BTSPV19kdngU/s1600-h/E+%26+cats.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqOKijjoxevV69p6Kaut4G5v8dW3C2HMlJfnb_4nLsjxATcAZugeZWc2Z86qzlY7tTnHAm-_pUn3WGNhLGNzyLCyjpxDkp-KdnXDYPGs6KDme5P044dG3bPcMWR7BwPo6BTSPV19kdngU/s320/E+%26+cats.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5176723407198707170" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-52244902316829212382008-03-09T23:10:00.011-04:002008-03-09T23:43:19.776-04:00It Always Ends The Same WayThere's no fooling this kid. She knows where she belongs - playing on a pile of sand, not snow. Forget this cold crap!<br /><br />We spent the weekend at grandma's again (trying to fill up the guilt-o-meter for when I move away. Again.) and from Saturday morning to early Sunday morning, we got 24 inches of snow. It was gorgeous . . . for about 5 minutes. That crap was heavy as all get out, and I about busted my ass trying to shovel out my car this morning. I settled for digging a path to get in it and then dropping it into 4-wheel to get over the snow bank in front of it.<br /><br />Everything was shut down, of course. Even the Pancake Breakfast at the local high school. That, my friends, is disappointment. Digging yourself out of a snowbound house, warming the car up, braving the roads, and finding the parking lot absolutely deserted. Obviously, we aren't the sharpest tools in the shed, not realizing that if most of the churches in the area were canceling services, that a measly pancake breakfast wasn't going to happen.<br /><br />So, we went over to my grandma's, where I busted my ass again digging a path to her door. There are two lazy, good for nothing (grown men) cousins that live within a mile and we're the ones that have to dig her out. Lazy asses.<br /><br />Eventually we made it back to my mom's house and I figured that this was an event that should not be missed by the child. We bundled her up and tossed her out in the cold for some pictures.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqlCpQT9wkg0bp2RHf7ZBDYC-rGRuIchFtWjhQrNLGP_JApZ-90pc6F4KEF0z2GqgQB5KZ_AmOFECvRdBfNBv2tuwlThZmaSI313k4nqEoRajhRYCeYEsN7rwPHT1jyavq5exHr8lu82M/s1600-h/3.9.08+Big+snow+1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqlCpQT9wkg0bp2RHf7ZBDYC-rGRuIchFtWjhQrNLGP_JApZ-90pc6F4KEF0z2GqgQB5KZ_AmOFECvRdBfNBv2tuwlThZmaSI313k4nqEoRajhRYCeYEsN7rwPHT1jyavq5exHr8lu82M/s320/3.9.08+Big+snow+1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5175947336673090914" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIpPbmIPCQN7YKdizj5a8wB9l-SdlBlxPRSKhzAE54yW5ZNW1cholC4FKG8Z9lcFzTtcxM94OSUJwZtz5RZOuqtea7oxpnbiM6mfwHQSIVpe463xrjyTmmoX9yFV32lzh74RFclH7Lyso/s1600-h/3.9.08+Big+snow+5.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIpPbmIPCQN7YKdizj5a8wB9l-SdlBlxPRSKhzAE54yW5ZNW1cholC4FKG8Z9lcFzTtcxM94OSUJwZtz5RZOuqtea7oxpnbiM6mfwHQSIVpe463xrjyTmmoX9yFV32lzh74RFclH7Lyso/s320/3.9.08+Big+snow+5.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5175949724674907586" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD_yIFVzmqYyMCDvVASSfAeNQQZj6L7_xdpzQlnNZWpAwoQSxW3zKl7sGp746x-CNI7De49kFtb3S_n-p5R-EDMo6lzwT3KOoZrqJ1557s-AEagOLzkJbkPZaT3LUIOB2f0OmIb0yBUWA/s1600-h/3.9.08+Big+snow+3.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD_yIFVzmqYyMCDvVASSfAeNQQZj6L7_xdpzQlnNZWpAwoQSxW3zKl7sGp746x-CNI7De49kFtb3S_n-p5R-EDMo6lzwT3KOoZrqJ1557s-AEagOLzkJbkPZaT3LUIOB2f0OmIb0yBUWA/s320/3.9.08+Big+snow+3.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5175949054660009378" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheMTnQ7c02uuhYBIeOrcgchmYBRlBp87z6CdkBtRsAZ_uS9uk8-Ch9ulW_meBbiaQsUdX90LUK42ZsEfDPoTZXGb1I3KUS9NQ9EpD1LxEEZ7J5ObDDKA1NYmFxI6D18fyEzx4ne8zpbzg/s1600-h/3.9.08+Big+snow+4.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheMTnQ7c02uuhYBIeOrcgchmYBRlBp87z6CdkBtRsAZ_uS9uk8-Ch9ulW_meBbiaQsUdX90LUK42ZsEfDPoTZXGb1I3KUS9NQ9EpD1LxEEZ7J5ObDDKA1NYmFxI6D18fyEzx4ne8zpbzg/s320/3.9.08+Big+snow+4.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5175949475566804402" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirKIETFaViHE85iPgFFzD5ncPQQYaLFA4RcWmctFXeCj9NPSz9k69OeNlzEntaCLfpaXTlzjQMpTzEFtjpRjXigF-9GIUzWKOusKU7bUy3okLNE9kZ-cO-Bac1M-s-7AqK7jR1u_BU6Uk/s1600-h/3.9.08+Big+snow+2.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirKIETFaViHE85iPgFFzD5ncPQQYaLFA4RcWmctFXeCj9NPSz9k69OeNlzEntaCLfpaXTlzjQMpTzEFtjpRjXigF-9GIUzWKOusKU7bUy3okLNE9kZ-cO-Bac1M-s-7AqK7jR1u_BU6Uk/s320/3.9.08+Big+snow+2.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5175948251501125010" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3rSQvIlpDD3Z7GrqGUAecdLDF9ywujYINjP609xusI032J_MsTDaWLxI36AB4XWYggStYGaESnvsaAGCufNYiC3HSDAhulYTXK3oW02YRJ6yQIVU3Djzn1_aLNtxt-A1D3HoO5Hg8Lb0/s1600-h/3.9.08+Big+snow+6.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3rSQvIlpDD3Z7GrqGUAecdLDF9ywujYINjP609xusI032J_MsTDaWLxI36AB4XWYggStYGaESnvsaAGCufNYiC3HSDAhulYTXK3oW02YRJ6yQIVU3Djzn1_aLNtxt-A1D3HoO5Hg8Lb0/s320/3.9.08+Big+snow+6.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5175949965193076178" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-76983439825388370782008-03-06T23:01:00.003-05:002008-03-06T23:04:38.152-05:00Fantabulous10 1/2 months later and we've got our first fever.<br /><br />I'm such a loving and caring mommy that I just couldn't help but pass on the sickness to the child. Poor thing is miserable and has already been up four times since I put her to bed.<br /><br />It's gonna be a fun night.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-66046731546813426332008-03-04T19:33:00.004-05:002008-03-04T20:09:23.285-05:00You Know It's Above 40There's a yearly phenomenon that occurs here in Northern Ohio. It commonly affects high school and college students. Common sense stands no chance. As soon as the temperature hits 40 . . .<br /><br />They forget to put their pants on.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEK6J48EHT5JHmA1WDWhM9JdS1mQyvgyBfIyRW-VxkKuOPYbutPXQqMnfNaiaxqg4GHv8_P7hHYqWaKmVoDbtRlV8C5qt5czpW-elJoQeWffo9_lZrhL2GslfqGEqyS3GOus5FGnTmRnA/s1600-h/runner.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEK6J48EHT5JHmA1WDWhM9JdS1mQyvgyBfIyRW-VxkKuOPYbutPXQqMnfNaiaxqg4GHv8_P7hHYqWaKmVoDbtRlV8C5qt5czpW-elJoQeWffo9_lZrhL2GslfqGEqyS3GOus5FGnTmRnA/s320/runner.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5174049610244779090" border="0" /></a><br />Yesterday, it hit 56 degrees. Spring! Spring! Spring! Despite the inability to go more than 2 minutes without sniffling and feeling like my head was going to explode, I took the kid out for a walk at the Metroparks. As I strolled along, I was lapped by scantily clad girls sporting fake n' bake legs and asses I would have even been jealous of 10 years ago.<br /><br />Bitter, party of one, your table is ready.<br /><br />Is it wrong to hope that those freshman 15 hit hard?<br /><br />Anyways, I got over myself and came to terms with the perma-jiggle going on with my own rear end. (Not running anymore is killing me. But given the fact that I feel 90, clutching my aching back, it's clear that I <a href="http://jayner.blogspot.com/2007/10/why-i-will-not-be-bull-rider-any-time.html">haven't healed</a> <a href="http://jayner.blogspot.com/2007/10/in-holding-pattern.html">nearly enough</a>, even after four months.) I huffed and puffed and hauled the stroller up the gigantic hill, stopped to give the kid some freedom and a biscuit, and then headed back to the car. I was almost there, and had put my camera away already. And then. I saw her.<br /><br />**Accept my sincerest apologies for not have a picture of this chick. But, I was too busy double-taking and scratching my head to dig it out fast enough.**<br /><br />Bouncy blond ponytail. Orange glow tan. Lime green sports bra. White belly tank. Sparkling clean running shoes. And . . . wait for it . . . men's briefs. That's right. Men's briefs. So skin tight that the front opening was gaping. Thank God she was wearing underwear.<br /><br />It was just wrong on so many levels.<br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">"Hey! Put your pants back on!"<br /><br /></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhS3J4EH7sqOhz9AyGCKokloMDGm8-ANuJG4V76DfqHNcspogYqxdqAmmZHutklajvgrnZkcQccos0aONfHv0_fnDE0yKzAMgRGBYOWkiI9ATIOKL0EAF48kb3XDMcliGwmcwI5PWGjfHk/s1600-h/3.3.08+E+in+stroller+1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhS3J4EH7sqOhz9AyGCKokloMDGm8-ANuJG4V76DfqHNcspogYqxdqAmmZHutklajvgrnZkcQccos0aONfHv0_fnDE0yKzAMgRGBYOWkiI9ATIOKL0EAF48kb3XDMcliGwmcwI5PWGjfHk/s320/3.3.08+E+in+stroller+1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5174049489985694786" border="0" /></a>jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-73970424487653348632008-03-03T00:48:00.003-05:002008-03-03T01:02:47.601-05:00Pass the Tissues, PleaseIf anyone needs to find me, I'll be on the floor of my room, wrapped around my humidifier, amongst a field of Kleenex.<br /><br />Tonight, in a fever induced haze, I did something extremely rare. I cleaned out the catch-all drawer of the kitchen. Among the five million batteries, pens, screws and keys to all the past places we've lived, I stumbled across the most excellent discovery of all time. Vick's drops for a humidifier. Absolutely awesome. My room is like a menthol rain forest right now.<br /><br />Oddly enough, I've never seen these things before, can't find them on the internet anywhere, and am convinced this will be a one-time experience. Which is a shame, because I can already feel the snot starting to flow.<br /><br />Hallelujah, I can breathe again!jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-15549518994229163062008-02-29T18:38:00.002-05:002008-02-29T18:46:18.854-05:00Eh? What'd You Say?Please tell me the screaming and screeching phase doesn't last long.<br /><br />What?<br /><br />What was that?<br /><br />Speak up, I can't hear you!<br /><br />Seriously, I'm surprised the husband's ear drums didn't shatter tonight when we were on the phone and E decided to climb up me and shriek right next to it every five seconds. My head is pounding and my ears are still ringing. I'm coming down with something involving a fever, chills and a sore throat, so the patience level was non-existent by the time the kid was deposited in her lid-less cage for the night. Thankfully, it's the weekend and there are five unsuspecting grandparents to pawn her off on.<br /><br />Although, this is an excellent payback for the drum set next door. In fact, we hung out on that side of the apartment most of the day.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-438753074024734270.post-89593115358826184932008-02-29T11:23:00.003-05:002008-02-29T11:35:11.432-05:00Dear Bicor VX1005I hate you.<br /><br />Yes, hate is a strong word, but I feel you truly deserve it. You are a sorry excuse for a sewing machine, dropping stitches, breaking needles, jamming the bobbin and switching tension when ever you want. It is completely unacceptable to cause me to stop and fix something every six inches, and to turn a two hour project into five.<br /><br />In case my point was not made clear by the repeated obscenities and banging on the table, you're on very thin ice here. If it hadn't been one in the morning and ten degrees outside, you can be sure that the dumpster would be your new home. And dumpsters are very lonely, cold places.<br /><br />I expect that we'll have a better relationship tonight. Otherwise . . . well, it's sayonara. Because I have 20 yards of fabric that aren't going to sew themselves.jaynahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14215255040847440452noreply@blogger.com11