Saturday, September 1, 2007

Dear Mr. Too Impatient to Chill for a Second

Dear Mr. Too Impatient to Chill for a Second

I'm sorry that when I happened to pull out into the road today I pulled out too close to you. I had never realized that over 1000 feet would not be enough distance. I apologize for the fact that by the time you came screeching up behind me, I was only going the speed limit. I was unaware that we are now required to go at least 20 mph over it on that road now. Please forgive me for failing to increase my speed in response to your bright lights being flipped on and off several times, and to your ability to hit your horn so many times in a row. It was truly impressive. However, my sleeping daughter was not impressed, as she was quickly woken up with your noise. I felt it only fair to retaliate. I'm sorry your weaving back and forth in your lane did not prompt me to speed back up the 10 mph to the posted speed limit. I do want to assure you that I was seriously considering break checking you, however, I am quite fond of my obnoxiously slow vehicle. I am so glad that you were able to seize the moment to fly past me while no cars were coming, even though it was a no passing zone. I do hope that no bugs got on that hand of yours that was outstretched from the window, pointing towards me. It is such a shame that as you crested the hill in front of me, you happened to pass one of our town's finest police officers. I truly am sorry that I had to turn before I got the chance to pass you, as you were being pulled over. I do hope you told the person you were on the phone with all about it.

Sincerely,
The Woman Who Drives Like a Normal Person

2 comments:

Qtpies7 said...

Oh my gosh! That is so maddening! I would have slowed down,too. One time in rush hour traffic this guy kept screaming at me and using his hands to sign "65", which is the speed limit on the road we were traveling along at a nice leisurely 32. Man he was ticked, but could I drive through the 200 cars in front of me? Not any more than he could drive through me. And he didn't know it but my brother was in the car behind him and was ready to kick his butt if he jumped out of the car at any of the complete stops we made. He couldn't go around me on a divided two lane highway, lol. I understand being mad when you need to be somewhere and traffic is keeping you back, but the car in front of me is not the problem.
I don't get it. Good thing your guy got stopped.

Thanks for sharing your blog addy on DS!

Jessie said...

Yeah! I love that he got pulled over, I am never that lucky when Mr. TITCFAS is behind me! Great letter mama - came for a visit b/c I saw your post on DS about your blog. Happy Labor Day!